Frank Facts and Reviews
Volume XVIII, No. 29
Sunday, October 7, 2012
A Boring Tale of My Most Recent Medical Experience
Tuesday, when I returned home from my “Bridge Day”, I found two rather frustrating “Voice Mail” messages. Both of these were spoken so softly, that I could barely understand what they were about, and both gave me phone numbers to call back, which I could only guess at. After playing each call several times, I risked calling the one that sounded as if the woman (?) was calling to remind me that I had an appointment at 8:45 the next morning (Wednesday). The number I had guessed at and dialed was not a legitimate one, so I called Providence Hospital and asked to be connected with the Neurology Department (since I was overdue for my 6-mos. checkup, and my condition had been steadily going downward). The operator connected me with Urology! I assured her that I had no trouble in that area (at the present time), but that I was badly in need of seeing my Neurologist again. I had seen him the last time way back in April: at which time he had told me that the results of the CAT scan I had to have, because I was unable to have an MRI (which cannot be taken if you wear a Pacemaker) indicated that I had suffered a series of small strokes. An MRI probably would have been more thorough, but it was out of the question.
To make a long and boring story a bit shorter, the operator finally told me that I was scheduled to see my Neurologist at 8:45 on Wednesday! What a relief!
I had always received a card, giving the time of my next appointment (after being given the date over the phone, and agreeing to the time) but this new system simply does not work. I made it clear that I want to know well in advance, when my next visit is scheduled.
When I arrived for this appointment, the parking lot at the Providence’s giant facilities, the parking lot on the side which includes buildings A, B and C, were running over with parked cars. I drove back and forth for ten minutes, and could find nothing from which I would be able to walk to B building for my date with fate. Just as I was about to give up and return home, a car pulled out of the first row of cars next to building B. I was lucky enough to pull into it before someone beat me to it. Sighing with relief, I got my Walker out of the car and rolled myself into the building. I found that my doctor’s office is now on the second floor, after going up and down the corridor before asking if it had changed. Yet I was still five minutes early!
Dr. Denson is a dear and genial man, and I always enjoy my check-ups with him. He told me that he had injured his own back since I had last seen him, and has a cracked vertebra. I told him that my left hip is now at least half a foot higher than the right one, and asked if that could be why I was beginning to have pains when I sit or lie down, as well as when I get up. He mentioned a condition that I may be developing, and checked my reflexes. He seemed satisfied, saying that all of my reflexes are normal and strong in each test; but said he would call in a prescription for medicine to relieve my pain. He asked which pharmacy I used, and I told him, K Mart’s. I assumed that he had e-mailed the information, and almost drove out there the next day, to pick up my meds. Luckily, I called beforehand and was told that the last prescription that had been called in for me had been in September. So, I had to call Denson’s nurse to ask what had happened. She apologized profusely, but I have to say that I have never seen anything more poorly operated as my last visit to this facility! And my experiences are many over the years 1984 (when Providence Hospital was downtown Mobile) to the present,
PS: I have been taking two of the pills each day and night since Thursday night (with the warning to eat something when I take them: or they will cause a burning sensation otherwise) and the pains are already gone!).
FOOTBALL 2012
Yesterday, USM and Ole Miss both lost their games: Ole Miss looked as if they had it made, then lost at the last minutes (rather like USM’s fate last week). But my dear Eagles were never even in their home game. They lost their 4th in a row, (14 to 40) to Boise State (the school with the blue grass!). I have decided to be philosophical: Our team in no worse than Georgia, who was trounced by South Carolina, managing only one TD; and mighty LSU got smothered by Florida, scoring only 2 Field Goals. Most of the sports announcers are at a loss to explain why this football season, which is now 1/3 over, is already so bizarre.
Cat Naps Quotes
“Everythiug I know I learned from my cat. When you’re hungry, eat. When you’re tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet’s, pee on your owner.”
Gary Smith
The Road to Ginger
I heard the phone ringing, and walked over to pick it listlessly off its cradle. I said, “Hello.” And was relieved when I heard Father Gorman’s voice, He was calling to ask me if I would be willing to play for a funeral that day, for one of our parishioners at St. Edmund’s by the Sea, where I was still employed as the Minister of Music. He was aware that Chipper had died in the crucial surgery he had undergone the day before. How ironic, I thought. I was in no mood to do anything, aside for wanting only to sit and feel sorry for myself all day long. On the other hand, it might make me feel better, just doing something for somebody else. I was unable to place the deceased man, when I was given his name, but agreed to bring some suitable music for the Mass. Sam Woodward, our mutual friend, who is a cellist, was going to play some unaccompanied Bach, so I wasn’t asked to read any complicated keyboard accompaniment for the first time. Sam would drive us down in his car, if I drove to his house. And so that is what we did.
Sam was a great pet lover, himself. has all sorts of animals living with him: a gorgeous Siamese cat, which I have never seen because she is always hiding when I have been there; dogs (plural) and even a pet monkey!
When I rang the bell and he came to the door, his kind words of sympathy started the water works again, so he quickly got us into his car and began the drive to the Island. I was determined not to make a spectacle of my grief, and managed to discuss what music we should play.
The funeral went well, and afterwards, Father Gorman handed each of us a crisp hundred dollar bill. That was certainly a pleasant surprise! When I saw the lady whose relative was being buried (I have forgotten how they were related) she happened to be someone who had always been very complimentary about my regular musical offerings, as well as my accompaniments to all the hymns sung by the congregation.
Back in my own home, the black veil of sorrow descended over the house like a shroud. Just the thought of eating anything made me nauseous. I walked into the study and dialed Janet’s number. I asked her if she would be willing to go with me the next day, after our bridge game, to look for a cat. My plan was to find something as near to Chipper’s beauty as I could find at one of the pet shops in Mobile. She readily agreed, and with that little ray of possible sunshine, I managed to get through the night.
2.
I drove up to her house and blew the horn at ten, as we had agreed the night before. She came tripping down the stairs and slipped into the seat next to me, with her usual sunny disposition intact.
“Well, I just feel it in my bones: we are going to find a kitty-cat just like Chipper today!”
“I’m not so optimistic, but I wish your feeling would prove to be right!” I hated to sound so gloom-and-doom-ish, but I knew, deep down inside of me, that finding another cat as beautiful and sweet as Chipper would be no easy task.
All of the stores had Tuxedo cats. I had no fewer than four of these black and white beauties, in a row: Two “Judies” followed by two “Trudies”! Trudy II was still with me at this time, and was the only one whose facial markings had not been perfectly symmetrical. When I first got her, I was not happy about that face: but in time, I came to adore it
There were lots of Brindled, solid blacks (I had two “Smutty Joe’s” in my childhood) and various shades of yellow—in short: they had everything except what I was looking for,
“Let’s go on home,” I said sadly. “I’m sorry to have wasted your morning.”
“Oh, that doesn’t matter. I’ll look in the paper. Lots of times I see ads from people who want to give away cats.”
I nodded, hopelessly. Muriel had found a cat right after I got Trudy II, on one of her visits from Baton Rouge. She had been thrilled to death with her good fortune.
As I thought back on her delight, my spirits began to rise a bit.
“Do you ever see anyone advertising selling their kittens in the paper?” I had known of this sort of thing, (that was how I found “Honey”, a gorgeous white Pomeranian, for Helen) but somehow, it had just slipped my so-called mind.
“Why, yes! But it’s usually someone who breeds fancy cats that are sort of expensive,” ever practical Janet mused.
“Well, I’d be more than willing to pay a couple-a hundred if necessary.” “Honey” had cost at least two hundred: and I had never seen anything that my sister had received all of her life, than she adored as much as she did this sweet little animal.
A few days later, the paper had an ad from a lady who specializes in the breeding of Persian cats! I could hardly believe my good luck. The litter would soon be ready for adoption, her ad stated.
I called Janet as soon as I thought she would be up. She said she would be happy to contact the lady and tell her I was interested. And there, and then, the Die was cast! There was definitely a Persian kitten in my future!
(to be continued)
TV Series Reviews
Yes! Your worst nightmare is a reality! I am starting a new feature! This is because all I can so is sit still and watch television, since I can no longer take in movies in their natural habitat. Between the stadium seating (what was wrong with inclined floors?) the eardrum-blasting volume of the Dolby sound system (or is there something newer and louder now?) the other business advertisements, the outrageous admission prices, and the cost of refreshments (I somehow cannot conceive of paying $5 for popcorn, and ditto Cokes, etc): Well, only the very wealthy, as far as I am concerned, can afford it. Add to this, the fact that about 50% of the biggest boxoffice attractions seem to be animated cartoons (when I see a big star’s name on a film’s credits, I expect that star to be IN the picture: not hearing the voice, while watching some Pixar trash!
In passing, let me mention again (for anyone who is unaware of my bizarre TV habits) that my usual first impression of any successful series is full of suspicion and pre-watching abhorrence of at least one of the main characters. Thus, I formed my own picket-line, bad-mouthing Seinfeld, Frazier, and The Closer- simply on my first impressions of their “Stars”- whom I had never watched for more than five minutes. In my own self-defense, however, I had never even heard of The Mentalist or The Big Bang Theory, until friends convinced me that they were sensational, and in all honesty, I found them both loathsome! That Mentalist in particular: I have never seen anyone more arrogant and for less reason to be so!
I’ll give you a sample next Sunday, when I plan to “take on” the new Masterpiece series on PBS, with their simpering replacements for Alistair Cooke, and Diana Rigg as commentators.
Movie Trivia Quiz #54
1. A Face in the Crowd was which actor’s breakthrough movie
role in 1957?
2. What was the name of the village where Gene Kelly found Cyd
Cyd Charisse, only to have her disappear for 100 years that night?
3. Who was the tough male star of the Treasure of the Sierra Madre?
4. Who was the star of A Clockwork Orange?
5. This lovely lady played the mother of the little nightmare child, in The Bad Seed. Extra points for the seedy horror.
6. Whose life story was The Miracle Worker?
7. Angels with Dirty Faces was the first film since Dead End for this teenaged group?
8. Who played the part of Flo Ziegfeld in Ziegfeld Follies?\
9. What actress was The Sunshine Girl?
10. In what film did Marilyn Monroe sing “We’re Having a Heat Wave”?
Answers to Movie Trivia Quiz #53 (All About Judy)
1. Judy Garland was the actress who was supposedly making a film about the inventor of the Safety Pin, in Ziegfeld Follies.
2. John Hodiak was the man Judy fell in love with in The Harvey Girls.
3. I Could Go On Singing was Garland’s last film.
4. Judy played a Jewish woman, testifying against the Nazis. in Judgment at Nuremburg.
5. Judy supplied the voice for the female lead in Gay Purree (animated cartoon)
6. Judy got the lead in The Wizard of Oz, when Fox would not allow Louis B. Mayer to use Shirley Temple. And aren’t we all glad she did!
7. Vincent Minelli was Judy’s Oscar winning director husband, and Liza’s Dad.
8. Judy starred with Gene Kelly in his very first MGM film: For Me and My Gal. Later, they made The Pirate and Summer Stock (which was her last film for MGM.)
9. Judy Garland won only one Oscar: for her role in The Wizard of Oz (it was as Best Child Star), In my opinion, she was cheated out of winning Best Actress for A Star is Born (first remake)
10. Tom Drake was the beau she sang about in “The Trolley
Song.” He was also “The Boy Next Door” (and Judy admitted to having a crush on him all of her life: but he wanted only friendship
Movie Trivia Quiz #52
1. Gary Cooper was the thief in Beau Geste.
2. Sam Jaffi played Gunga Din. Later he was a doctor in a series on TV
3. Kathryn Hepburn wore boys’ clothes in RKO's 1930’s movie Sylvia Scarlett. It was a boxoffice bomb, in its day, but achieved “Cult movie status in later years. Cast included Cary Grant and Brian Aherne.
4. Talullah Bankhead was Catherine, the Great., in A Royal Scandal?
5. She was also the reporter who saved her own Typewriter in wartime, in Hitchcock’s Lifeboat?
6. Marnie and The Birds were Tippi Hedrin’s only movies.
7. Melanie Griffin was her far-more-famous actress daughter.
8. Liza Menelli was “Junie Moon”, in Tell Me that You Love Me, Junie Moon.
9. RKO’s The Leopard Man was made after the success of The Cat People. Hattiesburg’s own Dennis O’Keefe played this sinister role.
10. Grace Kelly won an Oscar for The Country Girl. Academy Award winning Bing Crosby was her co-star.
2. Gary Cooper was the thief in Beau Geste.
2. Sam Jaffi played Gunga Din. Later he was a doctor in a series on TV
3. Kathryn Hepburn wore boys’ clothes in which RKO 1930’s movie that bombed totally?
4. Talullah Bankhead was Catherine, the Great., in A Royal Scandal?
5. She was also the reporter who saved her Typewriter, in Hitchcock’s Lifeboat?
6. Marnie and what other hugely successful movie were Tippi Hedrin’s only movies.
7. was her far-more-famous actress daughter.
8. Liza Menelli was Junie Moon, in Tell Me that You Love Me, Junie Moon.
9. RKO’s The Leopard Man was made after the success of The Cat People. Hattiesburg’s own Dennis O’Keefe played this sinister role.
10. Grace Kelly won an Oscar for The Country Girl. Academy Award winning Bing Crosby was her co-star.
Cat Naps
“Everything I know I learned from my cat. When you’re hungry, eat. When you’re tired, nap in a sunbeam. When you go to the vet’s, pee on your owner.”
Gary Smith
The Road to Ginger
I heard the phone ringing, and walked over to pick it listlessly off its cradle. I said, “Hello.” And was relieved when I heard Father Gorman’s voice, He was calling to ask me if I would be willing to play for a funeral that day, for one of our parishioners at St. Edmund’s by the Sea, where I was still employed as the Minister of Music. He was aware that Chipper had died in the crucial surgery he had undergone the day before. How ironic, I thought. I was in no mood to do anything, aside for wanting only to sit and feel sorry for myself all day long. On the other hand, it might make me feel better, just doing something for somebody else. I was unable to place the deceased man, when I was given his name, but agreed to bring some suitable music for the Mass. Sam Woodward, our mutual friend, who is a cellist, was going to play some unaccomplished Bach, so I wasn’t asked to read something for the first time. Sam would drive us down in his car, if I drove to his house. And so that is what we did.
Sam, being a great pet lover, himself. has all sorts of animals living with him: a gorgeous Siamese cat, which I have never seen because she is always hiding when I have been there; dogs (plural) and
When I rang the bell and he came to the door, his kind words of sympathy started the water works again, so he quickly got us into his car and began the drive to the Island. I was determined not to make a spectacle of my grief, and managed to discuss what music we should play.
The funeral went well, and afterwards, Father Gorman handed each of us a crisp hundred dollar bill! That was certainly a pleasant surprise! When I
saw the lady whose relative was being buried (I have forgotten how they were related) she happened to be someone who had always been very complimentary about my regular musical offerings, as well as my accompaniments to all the hymns sung by the congregation.
Back in my own home, the black veil of sorrow descended over the house like a shroud. The thought of eating anything made me nauseous. I walked into the study and dialed Janet’s number. I asked her if she would be willing to go with me the next day, after our bridge game, for a cat. My plan was to find something as near to Chipper’s beauty as I could find at one of the pet shops in Mobile. She readily agreed, and with that little ray of possible sunshine, I managed to get through the night.
2.
I got my good friend, Janet Morris, to go with me to every pet shop in Mobile. My goal was to find the “Nearest to Chipper” kitten I could.
They all had a lot of Tuxedo cats, but I still had Trudy II, who was almost a Tuxedo; except for non-symmetrical markings on her pretty little face. And I did not want another solid black (with two “Smutty Joes” in my past life. No. Nothing short-haired would do. I was, at this time, convinced that my adopted kitty was a Persian. He was not. Persians all seem to have pug noses.
So, as Janet would point out one cat after the next, I’d simply shake my head, “No”.
Movie Trivia Quiz #54
I made the mistake of telling a former piano student about the tape (on which I recorded his performance of a Clementi Sonatina.) He begged me to let him take the tape home, so he could make a copy of his performance, and I was stupid enough to let him. I never got it back. He apologized copiously, but it did little to compensate for my loss. I have never known such anguish as I felt at Chipper’s early death.
While he was with me, I never entered the house after going anywhere at night, that he was not there at the door, awaiting my return. If I drove myself, he knew instinctively that I would be coming back through the back
Movie Trivia Quiz #54
1. A Face in the Crowd was which actor’s breakthrough movie
role in 1957?
2. What was the name of the village where Gene Kelly found
Cyd Charisse, only to have her disappear for 100 years that night?
10. Who was the tough male star of the Treasure of the Sierra Madre?
11. Who was the star of A Clockwork Orange?
12. This lovely lady played the mother of the little “nightmare child”, in The Bad Seed. Extra points for the seedy horror.
13. Whose life story was The Miracle Worker?
14. Angels with Dirty Faces was the first film since Dead End for this teenaged group?
15. Who played the part of Flo Ziegfeld in Ziegfeld Follies?\
16. What actress was The Sunshine Girl?
10. In what film did Marilyn Monroe sing “We’re Having a Heat Wave”?
Answers to Movie Trivia Quiz #53 (All About Judy)
6. Judy Garland was the actress who was supposedly making a film about the inventor of the Safety Pin, in Ziegfeld Follies.
7. John Hodiak was the man Judy fell in love with in The Harvey Girls.
8. I Could Go On Singing was Garland’s last film.
9. Judy played a Jewish woman, testifying against the Nazis. in Judgment at Nuremburg.
10. Judy supplied the voice for the female lead in Gay Purree (animated cartoon)
9. Judy got the lead in The Wizard of Oz, when Fox would not allow Louis B. Mayer to use Shirley Temple. And aren’t we all glad she did!
10. Vincent Minelli was Judy’s Oscar winning director husband, and Liza’s Dad.
11. Judy starred with Gene Kelly in his very first MGM film: For Me and My Gal. Later, they made The Pirate and Summer Stock (which was her last film for MGM.)
9. Judy Garland won only one Oscar: for her role in The Wizard of Oz (it was as Best Child Star), In my opinion, she was cheated out of winning Best Actress for A Star is Born (first remake) to Grace Kelly.
10. Tom Drake was the beau she sang about in “The Trolley
Song.” He was also “The Boy Next Door” (and Judy admitted to having a crush on him all of her life: but he wanted only friendship
